I was a “C” for control.
Today, I’m wondering what type of canine breed you are?
I’m a bulldog.
You know — tenacious, determined, persistent, hanging on to the bitter end type of person.
Like any breed (or personality) there’s some good and not so good aspects to feeling a kinship with a specific characterization.
It’s good to stay at a task until it’s finished.
It’s good to persist through setbacks and disappointments.
It’s good to never give up hope.
What’s not so good is when your inside is telling you to quit and your driven-ness won’t accept defeat even when it’s the most sensible step to take.
While sticking with a project, goal, job, relationship through thick and thin can be admirable…it’s not always the wisest choice long-term.
Sometimes the best decision is to —
Abandon the project
Set a different goal
Find a new job
Let a relationship go
The hard part is knowing when to accept defeat in any of its forms (and stop viewing everything from a win/lose mentality) and do so graciously, learning from our mistakes as we go and move on.
I’m still finding it hard to accept defeat, even when it’s staring me straight in the face. I’d much rather push, pull, and press through thinking if only I try harder, things will work out as I expected.
Instead, I’m finding myself pressed hard against some walls that aren’t coming tumbling down no matter how hard I push.
Because I keep thinking I’m doing something wrong.
Isn’t that what we do?
Always come to the conclusion that we’re doing something wrong if we don’t get the results we expected?
Honestly, I want and need to change that.
Oftentimes, the messiness of a project, job, goal or relationship is part of its beauty.
The other part is what we learn along the way (which frequently helps us love other people with a tenacious, determined, persistent kind of love.)
And that’s always good “end results.”